Being a first-time mother while studying at university can be daunting prospect. Your friends are all out celebrating their dissertation hand-ins while you’re stuck indoors watching Eastenders. The first year being a parent can be the biggest struggle a mother will face. However it is time for parents to embrace the magical times ahead. Fortunately there is plenty of help both mentally and financially in order to be able to complete your education.
Meet Amber Jade Dinsdale, a 21 year old chef from Manchester. To her surprise, at the end of her second year at university, she discovered she was pregnant. Previous difficulties meant it was unsure if she could ever conceive. With only one more year left at university, Amber spent nine months going through a life-changing experience. With the support of her fiancé – who has two kids from a previous relationship, and her family, she has managed to overcome the challenges of working full time, moving house and university deadlines. Despite giving birth to a baby boy in February, she is aiming to obtain a 2.1 for her degree.
“I don’t let my education suffer as it is something I have worked hard for. I’ve been at university for four years so I didn’t see the point in deferring a year. I’m aiming to graduate with a 2.1 hopefully.” She continued: It’s hard for a dyslexic student to get a first unless they’re incredibly intelligent. That’s not me, I’m just moderately intelligent but I’m willing to try my hardest.”
According to the Daily Mail, women graduates wait until they hit 35 before having their first child - almost a decade later than those who don’t go to university. Additionally, a recent study carried out by the National Union of Students (NUS) shows that, 29% of 2,167 students with children who were questioned said they fell pregnant during their studies.
Amber admitted that she did plan to have children, just not whilst at university. Nevertheless, she is grateful to have the energy and flexibility as a young mother to take on responsibilities she will have for the rest of her life. Currently taking maternity leave, Amber has less time for herself than when she was working full time. With her fiancé at work, she has found herself surrounded by last minute assignments and nappies. Weeks before Jacob was born, the family found themselves moving house last minute. They wanted somewhere with a spare room and required a house that cost less to rent – not something easy to find on a busy schedule and with rising rental costs.
“I have no time for myself, not in between university work and looking after Jacob.” She admitted: “Moving house has got to be the most stressful thing I’ve ever done in my life. The previous house was suffering from damp. With a baby on the way and an asthmatic partner we just wanted to leave and start again, for the sake of the children.”
So how nerve wracking was the pregnancy? Amber expressed that the changes were not easy but that she would not change a thing. Fortunately she has had full support from her family and admits she does not understand how single mothers manage. Suffering from baby brain while pregnant and having to have time off for appointments meant requesting an extension at university. Of course, tutors were understandable.
“It is difficult getting used to your body changing and feeling sick but you have no option. It is helpful having a partner because they do the little things for you.” She recalled: “Your body goes through so many changes when you are pregnant, you don’t actually notice as much as you think you would. I didn’t get a baby bump till I was 30 weeks gone, whereas some girls get baby bumps from ten weeks.”
Did Amber have any advice for first time mothers?
“Don’t get pregnant,” she joked. “Just make sure you wait until you know what you want to do with your life or already have something set up. I don’t enjoy watching 16 and pregnant on MTV, or ‘who is the father?’ on Jeremy Kyle. Be patient, even if you wait until you’re in your late thirties.”
Diary of daily routine
5:30am I wake up and give Jacob his bottle. I have breakfast and we cuddle downstairs on the sofa.
7:30am The kids (Fiancé’s children) arrive and we sort them out. Jacob will have another bottle at about 8ish.
9:00am I take the kids to school as my fiancé doesn’t drive.
10:30am I feed Jacob another bottle. He usually stays awake till one and is fed once every few hours.
3:15pm I pick the kids up from school. I cook their tea and then they get picked up at 5:30.
6:00pm Dog walk.
I continue throughout the evening and night feeding Jacob his bottle whenever necessary. In between my daily routine I am cleaning or doing university work.
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